Author Archives: Karsten Seipp

Mike

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Mike

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What, precisely, does Mike the Micrometer measure? Foolish attempts by those who dare steal any mascot — especially those daring enough to try to nick Mike, who lives under the President’s watchful eye.

Past incarnations:

Herbert, a cast metal phoenix (1952), a lamppost, the Queen’s Tower (1958)

Current version:

Mike (1966)

owner:

Imperial College Union

Status:

Inviolate

Alias(es):

Mike

Details and dimensions:

Mike is a large, four-foot long, scale-accurate model of a micrometer that measures minute distances. He is the chunky 170lb (77kg) mascot of the Union itself.

Made-for-telly history:

“Temporary insanity” is what alumnus Ralph Cornforth called his actions in 1965.

Cornforth volunteered to be part of a committee comprising representatives from each college to create Mike. “I am still not clear what happened to lead me to volunteer to be the Royal College of Science representative. My best defence is temporary insanity and a background of machining acquired from my father,” says Cornforth.

You see, the College had a history of mascots going missing.

Consider the sad tale of Herbert, the previous year (1964). Herbert was a cast-metal Phoenix — so selected after a popular literary magazine (aptly called The Phoenix). He was named after writer H.G. Wells, once a student at the College. Well, Herbert had the misfortune of being nicked by two female students! These ‘ladies’ (of Churchill College, Cambridge) managed to seduce their way into the Herbert bearer’s flat, get him piss drunk, and make off with Herbie. Unable to retrieve him, the Union contemptuously decided to donate Herbert to the same college.

(Herbert’s male caretaker was so embarrassed he made great attempts to erase his name from our history books. Do you know who he was?)

Determined to save the next mascot from so ignoble a fate, the Union chose a lamppost, but this mascot and idea was quickly discarded. Next, students selected Colcutt’s tower (known today as the Queen’s Tower) to replace Herbert. Surely a tower with 60-foot piling was almost unstealable?

Perhaps… but the Queen’s Tower was essentially impractical to participate in mascotry. (“Oh, look. A big immovable object that is impossible to move and does nothing. Fantastic!”)

Cornforth explains how present-day Mike forged his way into history books and hearts:

“I haunted every machine shop in Imperial College until I got to know the great bunch of guys who ran them and together we worked out how to make Mike from the material available in their stores. The barrel and thimble were made from various sizes of heavy steel tubing. The anvil and fake ratchet were made from solid round steel stock. The frame was cast from brass.”

With due respect, Mr Cornforth, that is crazy. Crazy like a genius!

At the time no other college or university on the planet had a four-foot, brass micrometer as a mascot. (If you wondered, ICU still holds this rare distinction.)

So, it was determined that Mike should be on permanent display in the Union building. A concrete plinth was formed. The sturdy base included a safe with four locks.

These measures didn’t prevent Mike from being violated by University College London in his first year. “They had to cheat massively to do it,” explains Mr Cornforth.

“They hid a sneaky scumbag in the Union building after a dance. In the middle of the night, this apology for a human being let other low-lifes into the building via the back door. These disgusting creeps brought with them oxy-acetylene cutting equipment and used it to cut the clamps securing Mike to the plinth. All of this was, of course, completely against universally accepted mascot-stealing rules — but what else can you expect from University College?”

Indeed!

Can chains hold him? Apparently not; Mike has a very chequered history having been stolen by several colleges in London. Maybe Mike prefers the open road — after all, he is also very well travelled, having made many appearances on the University Challenge TV programme.

In addition, Mike is known to venture into the bar on many occasions… His favourite drink is a matter of great debate. However, it’s agreed Mike drinks like he has a hollow thimble.

First violated:

1965, by UCL (University College London)

Last violated:

On 10 July 2002, he disappeared at the President’s dinner, of all times, before being recovered three months later from behind a phone box outside the Royal College of Music.

Rumours:

It’s said that the best way to carry Mike is with the assistance of a ‘six-footer’ pole held by two people of equal height. The Live! Union website reports that Mustafa Arif (C&G President and ICU’s ‘Mike-bearer’ is Mike-bearer for life… which begs the question, is this just a snarky comment, or can university doctrine join man and mascot for life?

Tradition

Mike the Micrometer attends all important Union events at the discretion of the President. The President appoints a ‘Mike-bearer’ if he or she feels incapable of bringing Mike to any event. (See rumour above regarding length of ‘Mike-bearer’ title.)

Trivia:

At the moment Mike is the most securely stashed mascot in the history of mascotry. Doors to all offices surrounding him were immediately locked following a brash daylight thievery of C&G’s mascot, Spanner, in 2004…

Sources:

Is Mike really the most heavily guarded mascot… or is it just good PR and melodramatic fans? Share your comments below.
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Boanerges

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Boanerges

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Don’t be fooled by this old timer: this 1902 James and Browne town car enjoys more hands on his body than cars half his age.

Past incarnations:

Boanerges I was a 1908 Rover purchased in 1920

CURRENT:

Bo’ II is a 1902 James and Browne purchased in 1934 for £40

Owner:

City and Guilds College Union

Status:

Inviolate

Alias(es):

Bo’, Bojangles

Details and dimensions:

Bo’ (number plate AW 38) is the only known remaining 1902 James and Browne automobile produced in London from 1898 to 1910. Bo’ is highly unusual in a number of ways, including engine layout with the flywheel between the cylinders… and the fact that two people drive him! He is maintained entirely by volunteer students of the City and Guilds College Motor Club.

Made-for-telly history:

Bo’s name is taken from the Bible (Mark 3:17) and means ‘Son of Thunder’ or ‘Son of Fire’… appropriately named given the loud engine noise and bolting horses problems it caused when driven around London at the turn of the last century.

Early life was good to Boanerges. He took part in many ‘Brighton runs’ during the early 1920s, until it was determined that he was too new to participate and banned. The London to Brighton event, sponsored by the Veteran Car Club of Great Britain, is open to all motor vehicles (three wheels or more) built before January 1905.

Then came the ‘Biscuit Incident’ on 30 October 1924. Ramsay MacDonald was Prime Minister and the Rover was beyond repair. Bo’ was driven to Downing Street, emptied of petrol, and his gearboxes filled with gravel. A well-dressed, life size effigy with a biscuit in his hand was left in the passenger seat. This was a protest against the recent knighthood of a leading biscuit manufacturer chairman, or perhaps the fact Ramsay MacDonald had conveniently received a Rolls-Royce as a gift from the newly knighted biscuit company chairman, Lord MacFarlane. Apparently, the police had considerable difficulty moving the car. There is no proof but it is suspected that Guilds students knew they had proved their point and celebrated over several pints.

Onward to a new Bo’. Two students, John Garland and Dick Riddle, bought the present Bo’ from Lilleshall in Shropshire for the princely sum of £40 and towed it back to London. The car was christened Boanerges Mk II on 26 November 1925 — with a bottle of beer. Being seven years older, the new Bo’ could again participate in the London-Brighton runs and, even better, he could reach greater speed: 23 mph.

It should be noted that the first Bo’, ‘old Bo’’, was eventually towed away from Downing Street. (No record remains of the Prime Minister’s shouts of abuse). Old Bo’ was purchased by (presumed) student Peter Maxwell in 1936. Old Bo’ was garaged at the Crystal Palace race track and used as a track marshal’s car in 1939–40 until the army requisitioned the track. With no other garaging available and his owner at war, Bo’ found himself flying the skies – through the Ministry of Aircraft Production’s scrap collection programme.

First and last violated:

Never! With age and value considerations Bo’s public appearances are extremely limited.

Rumours:

A mysterious letter delivered to ‘X’ occurred on 9 July 2002. You see, to celebrate his 100th birthday Boanerges celebrated by being driven along the back roads of France from Boulogne to Paris. He made it to Paris in six days thanks in part to a back-up team needed to rebuild the engine. A letter from the Rector, Sir Richard Sykes, was delivered conveying greetings to ‘X… a.k.a. École Polytechnique. The letter is said to have conveyed polite greetings… but who can say with certainty?

Tradition

Although Bo can now be driven by only one person, the tradition of a co-driver is unlikely to disappear. Each year Bo’s new driver is chosen by the previous year’s driver. Bo’s driver is in control of the steering, brakes and gear changes, and the co-driver controls the throttle and ignition.

Trivia:

Bo’ is said to be one of only two James and Browne automobiles left in the world — the other being the newer 1904 model.

Sources:

Is Bo’ more popular than other other Imperial mascots? Share your comments below.
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Spanner

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Spanner

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Debate remains over who prefers the ‘heavy’ Spanner or ‘slim’ Spanner… but one thing is certain: both do the job after dark.

Past incarnations:

Spanner I (1937), Spanner II (1961)

Current version:

Spanner III (1964)

Owner:

City and Guilds College Union

Status:

Violate

Alias(es):

Wooden Spanner (inviolate)

Details and dimensions:

Spanner III is a 64lb brass spanner manufactured to perfectly fit the bolts on London Bridge. A recently surfaced, lighter Doppelgänger is constructed of wood.

Made-for-telly history:

Exactly what job after dark is Spanner said to accomplish? Unhinging London Bridge, of course! Although unscrewing the spans of London Bridge today is strongly ill-advised (thanks, MI6) you cannot help but admire the slightly subversive nature of the students who created Spanner in the early 1960s.

Heavy, hefty Spanner is meant to convey one thing: don’t mess with the brass!

Will any alumni from the turbulent 1960s step forward to discuss how and why they made a spanner their mascot?

That all changed in 1974. The first female Guilds President, Jenny Jones, was elected to office. Petite Jenny was unable to lift 68lb Spanner over her head during CGCU’s chant “Boomalaka!”.

(“Boomalaka, boomalaka, boomalaka!” goes the chant for minutes on end. Frankly, not all of CGCU’s men could pump heavy Spanner up and down over their heads for the duration of the chant, either.)

It was decided that a wooden replica would be made.

Brass Spanner was taken to student Philip Northey’s hometown of Plymouth. There he set about measuring and cutting a replica Spanner out of wood. He painted it so that both versions were identical.

“From a distance, it was difficult to tell [them] apart. However a look at the person holding the Spanner would quickly reveal which one was which. (The one hoisting the brass one usually sweating, shaking and with bulging veins on the temples!)” says alumnus, Philip Northey

Today, Wooden Spanner is inviolate, which means it would be considered theft if stolen… so better to pinch the real thing (if you can manage to capture it) if you’re planning a caper after dark.

First violated:

1960-something – anyone out there know? If so, please tell us in the comments.

Last violated:

2010

Rumours:

None that are fit to print. Really.

Tradition

Thanks to Mr Northey paving the way, replica Spanners marking 30 years after graduation were expected. In 2011, CGCU looked forward to the next Spanner incarnation courtesy the class of 1981. Was it be knitted of leggings and discarded tapes? (Note: ‘tapes’ were a form of music transfer commonly used between ‘records’ and ‘CDs’. Ask a history student.) Is there any news about Spanner 2011?

Trivia:

The ‘new’ wooden Spanner was collected from alumnus Mr Northey’s home by then CGCU President He-in Cheong on 12 September 2010.

Sources:

Live! 23 September 2010

Do you prefer ‘real’ Spanner or Wooden Spanner, and why? Share your comments below.
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Bolt

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Bolt

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Bolt is a 68lb wheel nut said to fit his best friend, the CGCU mascot Spanner. They literally fit together.

Past incarnations:

None I

Current version:

Bolt

Owner:

City and Guilds College Union

Status:

violate

Alias(es):

none known

Details and dimensions:

Bolt is a steel shackle with a chrome bolt passing through him, mounted on concrete, and is about a foot long. He was manufactured in 1968 and weighs 68lbs.

Made-for-telly history:

In 2000 Spanner and Bolt were declared ‘violate’ when CGSU’s other two older mascots, Bo and Derrick, were declared inviolate.

Step up and into the spotlight, lads.

Bolt and his ever present pal, Spanner, were purposely constructed to be heavy to deter others from capturing them and holding the mascots ransom. While a lighter Spanner (Wooden Spanner) was eventually made to accommodate College functions, Bolt remains steadfastly heavy.

Bolt was the central focus by “certain vigilante/illegal organisations such as the ‘Black Hole’ and ‘Trojan Horse'”, according to Council documents unearthed from 2005. These groups carried Bolt into controversy when they took part in mascotry without mascots of their own, thereby breaking the rules of mascotry.

All was resolved by calm, diplomatic negotiations between CGCU and RSM until…

Bolt made news in 2009 when he went on a skip.

This is highly unusual because, obviously, he isn’t so mobile. It was later learned that Bolt and Spanner were kidnapped and held for ransom. The anonymous ransom note was sent by email:

“As we told you some time ago, the mascots are safe,” said the correspondence sent to Live! It continued: “they are in trusted hands”.

Those holding Spanner and Bolt assured Live! that the two antique mascots would be returned to the CGCU at the Freshers’ Bar Night at Archangel, on Kensington High Street on 15 October.

However, this left Guilds without their mascots during Freshers Week, a vital time for the Faculty of Engineering union to attract the attention of the new intake of Imperial engineers.

The move raised eyebrows because a ransom note had not been sent earlier, leading some to wonder if Bolt had been carted off for good.

Bolt is heavy but violate, which means crafty, muscular teams might be able to steal him for ransom…

First violated:

Not known

Last violated:

Spanner and Bolt were kidnapped and returned in 2009.

Rumours:

Bolt continues to be a pawn in upstart student organisations eager to participate in mascotry.

Tradition

Trojan Horse Society, a.k.a. the Wooden Horse Organisation, is the team of Guildsmen which recovers the mascots when they are stolen, and attempts to liberate other mascots. Members were once considered outsiders but are now an accepted part of the game to raise funds for charity.

Trivia:

Spanner and Bolt bearers are usually elected at the end of the academic year. This gives mascot bearers the entire year to build upper-body strength suitable for hoisting Bolt overhead.

Sources:

CGCU website June 2012
Live! 2 October 2009
Live! 22 Sept 2009
Council Agenda, 24 November 2005
Live! 6 March 2000

Why does Bolt rally the attention of vigilante mascotry groups? Share your comments below.
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Theta

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Theta

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Never underestimate the powers wielded by a seven-foot long steel thermometer.

Past incarnations:

Theta I (1958), Theta II (1964), Theta III (1970)

Current version:

Theta IV (1975)

College:

Royal College of Science Union

Status:

Violate

Alias(es):

Unknown

Details and dimensions:

Weighing in at over 100lbs (45kg), Theta MK IV is a seven-foot long solid stainless steel engraved metal bulb and six feet of steel hydraulic piping calibrated (logarithmically) from zero Kelvin to Infinity. Hot mama!

Made-for-telly history:

On the cold, dark night of 30 October 1958, Theta I appeared in a bath of flames on Imperial Institute Road… This proved a rather dramatic entrance for Theta I, born on 20 February, because she was then just a ballcock screwed on a four-foot-long broomstick and painted in RCS colours. Why a thermometer? Every student, save for the oddball mathematician, uses a thermometer at some point during their studies here. Theta I was christened at the Fresher’s Dinner that October night, where the following verse was recited:

“Freshers, into your guiltless hands we fling
Defence of this Thermometer, a thing
Handed down by generations, we recall
‘Twas made last year out of a cistern ball.”

It should be noted that Theta I was far more interesting than the drum previously used to announce RCS’s presence at RAG events, barnights, and Morphy Day. (No, the drum you see in the office is not the original. That was nicked from Southampton much later on.)

First violated:

November 1958 – ‘doh! Theta I was lost at Morphy Day that year. She was regained about two weeks later from the middle of the Round Pond in Kensington Gardens, where Guilds had floated her. (No word if this tomfoolery was amid tomato and flour fights.) Theta suffered many violations her first six years during the turbulent 1950s and 60s.

Last violated:

1991 – Bearer Steve Dorman was hit by a van defending Theta during a scuffle with C&GCU raiders outside the Royal Albert Hall. Dorman suffered a broken leg. (Note to Steve Dorman: Theta wonders if you’ve forgiven her? Please write.) This incident changed a few rules at Imperial so that mascotry could be pursued without actual bloodspill.

Rumours:

Theta Mk II was never recovered, and rumours of her eventual location ran from Euston left luggage office to a hotel in Belgium — indicating to Scotland Yard investigators a welcome attitude toward baggage (emotional and otherwise), and taste for waffles.

Tradition

If Theta is violated, the RCSU’s committee must throw her into the Round Pond in Kensington Gardens on her return, and commission a new Theta. Each version is a ‘virgin’.

Trivia:

RCS was without a mascot for the longest period ever — from mid-October 1969 to 10 October 1970 when Theta MK III began to take shape. Prior to Steve Dorman’s valiant attempt to protect her in 1991, Theta had not been violated since 1973.

Sources:

The History of RCS Mascotry from 1958 to 1987
Felix, Issue 988, p2, 4 February 1994

Is Theta more popular than other other Imperial mascots? Share your comments below.
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Jezebel

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jezebel

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Jezebel is aptly named after a Phoenician princess of Sidon who won’t do what she’s told. Don’t mess with her, either: she pumps water — and attitude! — at 500 gallons per minute.

Past incarnations:

None

Current version:

Jezebel I

Owner:

Royal College of Science Union

Status:

inviolate

Alias(es):

Jez

Details and dimensions:

Jezebel, number plate LP8389, is a 1916 Dennis ‘N’ Type fire engine weighing five tons and has 55 square feet of brass to polish.

Made-for-telly history:

Jez was there when Zeppelin firebombs covered the London skies. But her story begins a few years before…

Dennis Brothers built Jez in 1916 for the London Fire Brigade (LFB). They tested her on 27 January 1916. Jezabel, known then simply as LP8389, was one of a batch of six fire engines supplied to the LFB on 16 April 1916. She was initially posted to Vauxhall fire station under the threat of Zeppelin raids.

On Tuesday 28 November 1916, a German LGV C.IV seaplane heavily bombed Chelsea in the first aeroplane raid (as opposed to Zeppelin raid) on Britain. Ten people were injured and the raid caused extensive damage. It is probable LP8389 attended these incidents, too.

LP8389 was still at Vauxhall Fire Station two years later when a fire erupted on 30 January 1918. The fire raged at Branton’s cattle market in the early hours of the morning. Relief efforts were obstructed by a dense fog. A wall collapsed suddenly and seven firemen died. Many more were injured. This fire, later referred to as the Albert Embankment disaster, is noteworthy because it caused the greatest loss of brigade life (outside World War II) to date.

A bad luck streak continued for LP8389 on 27 February 1919 when she collided with a carrier’s van in Rotherhithe Street. But in a few short years things would change.

By 1932 LP8389’s life with the London Fire Brigade ended. She was sold to Joseph Crosfield and Sons Limited, a Warrington-based soap manufacturer, when LFB upgraded its vehicles. At this time she had no ladder, so Crosfield fitted an Ajax extension ladder. She spent the next years carrying hose reels and towing a trailer pump for the company.

By the 1950s, students of the Royal College of Science were looking for a suitable means of transport for their President. On finding that there was a fire engine for sale, the students made an offer of £50 for the vehicle. After consideration of the offer, the Joseph Crosfield firm was kind enough to donate LP8389 to the students of the Royal College of Science for the “educational value”.

Jezebel got her name shortly thereafter.

Have a detailed look at Jez’s life in the decades since — including her brief appearance on film, and break down at a wedding.

First violated

May 1959 – Jez was stolen from a University of London event by University College, but was recovered a couple of days later.

Last violated:

If you value your life… don’t even try: Jez has lots of fans.

Rumours:

Sitting on Jezebel brings good luck and/or a sore arse for 48 hours.

Tradition

No one must touch a fresh coat of paint… even royals. Consider yourself warned. In 1965 at Imperial, the Queen Mum almost became a victim of Jezebel’s new paint job, having her pristine white gloves saved from the stain of scarlet coach paint by of one of its quick thinking keepers who shouted: “Don’t touch, Ma’am. It’s still wet!” Gallantry at its finest.

Trivia:

Jezebel might be the least ‘green’ mascot because she only does four miles per gallon! Good thing the old bird stays home most of the time these days…

Sources:

What’s your favourite Jezebel memory? Share your comments below.
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Victoria and Albert

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Victoria and Albert

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Since ancient times lions have been revered in mythology and legend for their power and strength. Just like Imperial athletes but much more hairy.

Past incarnations:

None

Current version:

Victoria and Albert

Owner:

Sport Imperial

Status:

Inviolate

Alias(es):

Vicky and Al

Details and dimensions:

Sleek, muscular, and graceful – these are descriptions of the athletes at Imperial. However, these words don’t accurately describe the rotund furry mascots, Victoria and Albert.

Made-for-telly history:

Matt Taylor had the honour of naming Imperial’s newly-born mascots. Matt, a fourth year Mechanical Engineering student, won a naming contest in 2010. Matt won admittance to an extraordinarily small and elite group of Imperial mascot-namers — an eternal award — and a £15 Amazon gift voucher.

Neil Mosley, Head of Sport Imperial, reviewed the submitted names and made the final decision.

The names are perfect because Imperial College London is part of Albertopolis and a statue of Queen Victoria stands in the College’s Main Entrance. It is no coincidence that lions were selected because they traditionally symbolise bravery, valour, strength, and royalty. Lions are the king of beasts, as Imperial is the king of sport – mostly. Plus there are stone lions on the Queen’s Lawn.

Vicky and Al are well-loved and make appearances at sporting events around campus and elsewhere.

Today Victoria and Albert are inviolate, which means you’d be foolish to try and steal them, and should look for a lion or lioness costume somewhere else.

First violated

Not yet.

Last violated:

You wish!

Rumours:

Those who wear the costumes claim they can see otherworldly happenings while wearing them. We say: don’t wear the costumes deeply dehydrated.

Tradition

Vicky and Al may be rented out for children’s parties… but not adult parties.

Trivia:

Fact #1: The Vicky and Al costumes are made from the finest fleece on the market today. Fact #2: Not everyone who has applied to wear the costumes has been able to squeeze into the suits. We suggest extra sport activity.

Sources:

Live! 2 April 2010

Who do you think is running around wearing the Vicky and Al costumes? Who should be? Share your comments below.
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Derrick

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Derrick

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Derrick is a 1926 Ner-a-Car motorcycle.

Past incarnations:

None

Current version:

Derrick

Owner

City and Guilds College Union

Status:

Inviolate

Alias(es):

None

Details and Dimensions:

Derrick is a classic Ner-a-Car motorcycle, built in 1926, the last year of
its production and he is the ‘little brother’ to Bo’.

Made-for-telly history:

Derrick is the result of a sultry affair – or at least commercial union – of British and American ingenuity in 1926.

Our Derrick was produced in Kingston-upon-Thames, one of just 6,500 built by Sheffield-Simplex car manufacturer. Sheffield-Simplex licensed a name and designs from the American Near-a-Car Corporation. All production moved to the UK from 1919–26.

Derrick is powered by a 350 cc Blackburne side valve engine driving through a Sturmey-Archer three speed gearbox. True to his English roots, Derrick’s Sturmey-Archer gearbox was manufactured in Nottingham.

Reported The Clarion at the time: “In the model ‘C, Ner-a-Car, the Sheffield Simplex Company have produced something which will give all the speed a sane man can desire, plus the riding comfort and safety which make the Ner-a-Car famous. The new Blackburne engined Ner-a-Car is probably the finest example of two wheeled comfort in the world.”.

The motorbike was marketed to the upper classes. Riders included the Earl of Haddington, the Earl Fitzwilliam, the Earl of Bective and the Duchess of Marlborough.

What happened to Derrick between the time of his birth, er, manufacture, and his eventual acquisition by the Union in 1980 is left largely to the mysterious pages of history…

We do know, however, that he was a gracious gift of a (now retired) Aeronautics teaching professor, Roger Serpell, who was also Head of the Imperial College Red Cross Service. Roger had intended to restore Derrick but never found the time, so he gave Derrick to Guilds.

Reported Felix on 3 October 1980:

“GUILDS finally got a round to naming Ner-a-Car at the Freshers’ UGM on Tuesday. It was decided that the name chose had to compliment ‘Bo’. Suggestions ranged from the purile (‘peep’ and ‘geste’) to the brilliant (‘LLOCKS’). In the end it came down to a chioce of the two, the already mentioned ‘LLOCKS’ and ‘Derrick’ After a show of hands and a count ‘Derrick’ was declared the winner and the name is now official.”

Yes, that also meant the mascot duo would be referred to as ‘Bo Derrick’, in homage to popular Hollywood star Bo Derek. (Ha!)

Derrick remains in good health and makes frequent outings in Kensington thanks to maintenance by a group of volunteers. Derrick may be old but in some ways ahead is remains part of new trends in motorcycle design. Derrick is a very early example of a ‘feet forward’ motorcycle. This is a class of motorcycles ridden with the feet forward, as in a car, instead of below or astride. This class of vehicle differs from a scooter and designs are still evolving to give riders the performance and handling of a motorcycle with the comfort of a car as a transportation alternative.

Derrick makes the annual London-Brighton run alongside Boanerges. Aeronautical Engineering undergraduate Mateusz ‘Mat’ Gocek had the honour of riding Derrick in 2011–12 year.

Reports Mat about the experience:

“Derrick is extremely reliable and virtually maintenance free, when compared with Bo’. In fact, I only realised I actually was supposed to give it some pre-run service on the day before Brighton, which involved hardly anything else than topping up the fluids and greasing the wheel hubs — not at all bad for an almost century-old vehicle!

This odd-looking thing gathering dust between the lathe and the engine hoist in the corner of the garage caught my attention as soon as I joined the Club in 2010, mostly due to the three factors: the forward-foot sitting position, the readily visible valve pushrods and the absolutely archetypical sound the 350cc Blackbourne engine makes (you can tell I’m an engineer!). Ah, and the idiosyncratic looks…

The day of the run was crazy. Apart from Derrick, Bo’ was also supposed to be accompanied by another Imperial mascot, the 1916 fire engine called Jezebel. As the cruising speed of Jez is somewhat closer to that of Derrick, we have decided that the motorbike should more or less follow Jez, which is the usual practice. It’s just that Derrick doesn’t seem extremely happy at the medium second/low third gear, and also feels a bit unstable even at Bo’s top speed, which is somewhere around 28mph – speed testing to be performed in the near future!

And so there I was, right outside the Jez garage, well before the dawn. I’ve put the Derrick coat on top of my usual motorcycling clothes, which turned out to be quite an involving task that took some trial and error during the run in spite of the advice given to me by some of the older Jez people who remembered the times when such outfits were in regular use. I learned about the suit on the day, not before — I saw it in the garage before, but never figured out its actual use.

Never in my life had I experienced any problems with starting Derrick – apart from that one morning. Bo’ had already left for the Hyde Park, and Jez and I were supposed to wave him off after the official start and then make our way to Brighton in our own time, adjusting our route according to our needs and abilities. I had the engine running just before Jez got ready to go, yet I’ve somehow managed to get the engine flooded the moment she set off. Oh well, a typical bump starting procedure solved all the issues – this thing is older than my Grandma after all.

The ride to Hyde Park was short and filled with engine stalls, missing Jez at traffic lights and watching all the odd-looking vehicles around. We left Jez and Derrick outside the park, as for obvious reasons only the vehicles actually participating in the Brighton run were allowed in. After Bo’ set off, I got lost as I walked back towards Derrick. I saw Jez waiting for me on the other side of the road, but as I knew it would take me some time to actually get going, I just texted them with an instruction not to wait for me, and took my time getting back to the motorbike. From now on I went on my own. Oh well, improvising is my thing after all…

The actual run wasn’t as scary as I initially thought. I was riding at my own speed, the entire navigation based on the file of more-than-hundred-year-old vehicles, appreciating the variety of the motor cars before a standard, well-proven, optimised and somewhat boring set of automotive solutions has been established. I caught up with Bo’ at some point, which was an extremely pleasant experience, before shooting off in search for Jez (which I didn’t manage to see during the entire run). In the meantime I have managed to find and pick up a massive brass gear broken in half (goodness knows what happened to the poor vehicle that once utilised it – we’ve given it to the organisers as someone will be missing it!) skid a bit – quite an achievement in Derrick, who despite having two rear brakes isn’t terribly easy to stop, and finally experienced the horrors of his top speed, estimated at some 55mph on the final stretch of A23. After getting to Brighton an hour before Bo’ and spending all that time constantly getting lost and figuring my way towards the shore, we’ve loaded Bo’ on his trailer, stacked Derrick in the back of the Land Rover towing it, and made our way towards the pier with intentions of getting on with the Brighton tradition by having a few well-earned pints.”

First violated

Never.

Last violated:

Never, and you’d be a fool to try!

Rumours:

Derrick is said to be the favourite mascot of couples comprised of one Brit and one Yank.

Tradition

Derrick rides along with Bo’ on the annual Brighton run.

Trivia:

Less than a dozen Ner-a-Cars are believed to exist in the UK today. Four are model C, and only one of these four (Derrick) is running.

Sources:

Is Derrick your favourite Imperial vintage vehicle? Share your comments below

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Phoenix

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phoenix

Phoenix

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Medics rushed to the scene when, in 2009, a new mascot was born. Was it the mascot’s unusual lineage? Natural fighting instincts? The debate continues, but one thing’s certain: don’t call Phoenix a ‘chicken’ because only the strongest are known to survive. An unlikely, chicken-looking — nay, Phoenix-looking! — mascot borne of three parents.

Past incarnations:

None

Current version:

Phoenix

Owner:

Imperial College School of Medicine Union

Status:

Violate

Alias(es):

None

Details and dimensions:

Phoenix is a yellow-costumed suit. Not just anyone can wear Phoenix’s feathers. The honour is bestowed by secret society to the student nominated as ‘most daring’, and hence, known to have the greatest ability to instill stone-cold fear (or jolly good fun) in opponents. Phoenix is the mascot of the Medics Union.

Made-for-telly history:

Some say Phoenix first arose to dominance in 2009 — but they are wrong.

The Phoenix began drawing power for his rebirth in 1988, back when St Mary’s Hospital Medical School merged with Imperial. At that moment there was an undisputed spark of lasting, heated competition. Could you expect anything less when two formerly opposing rugby teams merged?

By 1997 the flames grew hotter as Charing Cross and Westminster Medical School (another competitor!) merged with Imperial and the Imperial College School of Medicine was formed in 1997 (later becoming the part of the Faculty of Medicine responsible for undergraduate medical teaching).

So, by 2009, Phoenix reached a point of no return. He burst forth at the annual varsity rugby match between Imperial College Medics and Imperial College.

Rugby: just the beginning. Now Phoenix attends all the sports games. Yes, both the sports matches during the day and J.P.R. Williams match in the evening.

The design of chicken suit, er, Phoenix suit was based on the original ICSM logo. The design incorporates a blue St Mary’s fleur de lis on the right hand and right foot of the Phoenix and the red Charing Cross on the left hand and left foot of the mascot.

Who is the person behind the suit? The person tasked with invoking the Phoenix deity of competition? The person encouraging the players and entertaining the crowd at the matches?

Some guess it is a random medical student pulled from Reynolds Bar at Charing Cross Campus. Not a bad guess. After all, the featured mascot’s everyday nest is nearby.

But wrong. In fact, the honour goes to a student nominated by the ‘Secret Nine’.

The Secret Nine is an invitation-only club with nothing more than an espionage-sounding name and access to the Phoenix suit. At the start of the academic year the Nine meet at an undisclosed location said to be “nine paces east of the heart, nine steps south of the mind, and nine turns from three”, a three-pronged riddle as yet unraveled by intrepid reporters at Felix.

From this series of meetings the Nine nominate a current student who possesses ‘most daring’ credentials and, in the words of Anil Sunny Chopra, Past President of the Imperial College School of Medicine Students Union, and rumoured member of Nine, is ‘up for it’.

Phoenix isn’t shy about a fight, either. This year Phoenix was tackled by a group of Imperial College boys as he heckled a losing rugby team… and yes, he’ll do it again.

First violated:

Phoenix’s head was stolen in 2011 with a ransom demand that included a £200 donation to RCSU RAG, the ICSM President streaking in Beit Quad with only the Phoenix head on and a Medicine-wide email stating that “RCSU is better than ICSMSU”.

Last violated:

Not lately as far as we know.

Rumours:

Sleeping with a Phoenix feather under your pillow before exams is said to bring luck. Sleeping with the Phoenix suit-wearer is said to bring even more.

Trivia:

Phoenix suit is partially invisible.

Sources:

  • Oct 2010 As told by Anil Sunny Chopra, Past President of Imperial College School of Medicine Students Union.

Phoenix struts his stuff by dancing on the sidelines at sports matches. Have you tangoed with him? Comment below.

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